I like curly_sue, and her violence :D
Well guys, I guess it's time for the truth. I am actually an overweight female who has been pretending to be a male since I joined. Knowing I would be bombarded by PMs filled with bizarre sexual innuendos and guys frothy at the mouth to see my tits, I decided that on this forum, I would act like a uninhibited alcoholic male.
Things started getting crazy when I began to take testosterone and drink rum to fill the role better. My life spun out of control. My voice grew deeper than my brother's. My boyfriend and I were having sex, and I guess he finally noticed when I started belching deep roars. I heard myself and suddenly realized I sounded like the lead singer of a grindcore band. He freaked out, put on his clothes, and ran out of the room with tears streaming down his face, his last tremulous words stifled by sobs were "I'm so confused right now." I let out a deep groaning cry and logged onto SC. The only thing that keeps me going at this point is cuddles from Mika and Pray.
This morning I woke up from a dream that messed my whole day up. My lil sis was starving with me in the room and I couldn't do anything about because all the stores were too far away and our car didn't have any gas. I woke up crying and punching all the walls and it took me some effort to collect myself up.
IRL my lil nigga has been doing stuff like drugs and sleeping around with boys so Nmom pounced on her chance to gain complete control and make an attempt to break my little sis into a punching bag and puppet for her. I've been pacing back and forth in anxiety starting from the morning and crying non-stop as scenarios of what could the piece of shit be doing to my little nigga pop up in my mind in the most gruesome and horrifying ways. I don't know if I could ever look in the mirror or live with myself at all if I let my nigga down like that and let the hungry crows peck on her. If it takes for me and a few others to die for my nigga to live free and be happy then so be it.
Had this on repeat since morn
I would only say this if I knew you were capable of doing the right thing for her regardless of personal harm (mentally and physically) but perhaps you should look into asking others who are in a more stable situation in life to provide for her for the time being. Sometimes no matter how hard you want to do something for someone you can do it yourself.
Maybe swallowing the pride is the right route, then again I have no clear picture of the situation so i might be wrong.