No need to elaborate further than your first 2 paragraphs.
I already could see your question coming from a mile away, yes, there are other words (synonyms) that you can use in place of ''although'' such as despite and albeit.
I hope you don't feel too compelled to thank me neither, I just saw a way to improve your vocabulary!
Good morning/evening/night.
Sure.
Well early on it was feigning guilt or regret to get a far less severe punishment. Parents thought I already felt bad for what I did so they were more lenient on me. I remember once whispering to myself "Just tell the truth" while my father was talking to the woman who caught me. I then told him it was someone else's idea and he believed me as he thought I didn't think he could hear me.
When it comes to the group I spend time with I actually got everyone to essentially just trust me with their secrets. By making a show of not not telling anyone peoples secrets and subtly hinting of other people who had. This has allowed me to learn many things about people, funnily enough often through people the original person believed to be trustworthy. I have of course told people certain secrets to make things interesting but did it secretly and made that person believe I only truly trusted them. That's something I have to be very careful with though because people love to talk.
With that friend that I basically fucked with through most of my school years it was an abundance of things. From simply just frightening him by popping out of nowhere to informing him of all kinds of terrible news that shows how dangerous anyone can be even to just getting people to recite a nursery rhyme that I had learned creeped him out.
And as far as arguments or debates go it depends on the person but often I simply use my rationality for that. I get them to agree to something which is obvious by anyone's standards then twist it in a way that makes them think they've come to their own conclusion and agree with me.
There was a time when I was bored so I started to play with the concept of morality with people for example. I asked them if they thought any action was truly evil or good. The ones who believed themselves to be intelligent said no (as I knew they would. And of course they're minds all went to murder as the worst thing) Then I brought up rape. And asked if they though that was ok then. They all retraced their steps and said they now believe there were actions that were evil. I then brought up what if they could save their whole families by raping some horrible human being (e.g. Save everyone who died in WW2 by raping Hitler) They then changed their minds and decided that nothing was evil or good. I personally thought my defense of rape was flimsy at best but it worked on everyone. Of course I didn't achieve anything from this, I just enjoyed proving and witnessing how fragile everyone's morality and opinions are. Things they believe only they have control over.
Hope that's enough info. I tried to keep it fairly short.
According to her it was less that I fucked with them. She found that hilarious but more that I started the whole conversation just so I could fuck with them. But I get your point it's like fucking with those people knocking at your door preaching religion. They're asking for it.
Hey so guess what I'm gonna ask? Nothing quite yet. I thought this forum had been shut down as I lost track of it after I wiped my computer a while back. Honestly I'm just gonna talk a good bit because I have no other outlet.
So... here's how it goes. I would say I have stunted emotions at best but I would be lying if I claimed I had none. I've felt sadness, anger, happiness (I think) don't think I've felt empathy, the closest thing is that I've felt awkward when people show an abundance of emotion towards me. I don't enjoy hurting animals or people. Although I did do it a little bit as a child, out of curiosity more than anything. Used to play with dead animals too. I changed friends quite rapidly, I'd get bored of one group and try a different one but I kept a network of close friends throughout this time. I had a normal upbringing, only ever got hit by my parents once. I often did bad things as a child and I often got away with it. In fact the worst thing I was caught for (pretending to be collecting money for charity when I just wanted money) I blamed on someone I was with and got away with it. To this day I'm proud of young me since I was about 8 and cleverly manipulated my father who wasn't easily manipulated. I've never felt remorse for anything I've done. I don't really think I love my family, I don't really know if I care for them.
I get bored of everything very quickly, and am almost constantly bored. I don't do too much risk taking, although I did as a child as most children do although I may have gone a bit further than most. I feel like my collective childhood has somehow trained me to avoid taking risks regardless of my nature and boredom. I'm not sure how it happened maybe my parents are a lot smarter than I give them credit for. Or maybe I'm the result when someone like me gets raised by a very normal family who has experience raising kids.
I can be pretty manipulative when I want to be. In an argument I always get people to agree with me by the end even people who have known me for years and know my nature by now. And of course I occasionally do the more subtle form of manipulation but I've found that it's a lot more likely to come back and bite you as people love to talk and say "he told me this" before or after whatever you plan to happen, happens.
Like I said before I'm not a sadist, at least not physically. I gain no joy in physically causing things pain. I do love messing with people though even on the most basic level. Not long ago I had to kill 30 minutes with my girlfriend and these sales people approached me and wanted me to change my internet. My girlfriend wanted to leave but I was bored so I played into it, knowing I had no intention of doing this. I basically played along for 20 minutes watching these people get real excited as I was about to sign the contract then "suddenly" decided not to saying no thank you and walking away. My girlfriend was shocked and when I explained to her what I was doing she called me "evil". This is a very small thing really, all I did was waste some peoples time on purpose and get their hopes up for nothing, but it still brought me joy.
All that to me. Points to a sociopath/psychopath. But then I have other aspects of myself.
I am a very anxious person. This happened around about the same time I started resisting my natural risky impulses without really noticing it. I'm extremely paranoid but I'm very aware of this and often combat it because I realise my paranoia. I have huge trust issues, I honestly don't trust anyone the person I trust the most is my girlfriend and I still don't trust her with most of my thoughts and opinions. I also won't take her by her word, but I don't let her know this. I'm typically a very honest person. I don't see the point in lying a lot of the time, at least not to people who've known me for all of my life, but I do lie to others and very convincingly if I do say so myself.
My girlfriend... The main reason (other than my anxiousness) I doubt my psychopathy. We've been together for over a year now (I'm only 18 and she was my first serious girlfriend, kinda) At the beginning she was enthralled with me. Found me fascinating, I didn't find her too interesting but figured the way this was going could only have ended well for me. She had observed how I act around people and how I dealt with my friends and found me to be unique we talked, we ended up dating, she claimed love by a week in. Later on claimed she loved me way before but was nervous. I claimed love after we first had sex, felt only right to do it then, although I didn't really feel it. Eventually i thought I might love her. I wasn't sure if it was love or just my brain enjoying have a sexual partner for the first time (kind of). She'd often talk about spending our whole life together, kids and marriage and such it never bothered me and for a time I could picture it too, although I didn't particularly look forward to it. So as you can imagine, I definitely felt something strong for this woman, love or not, it caused me to doubt what I was (although I have read it is possible for sociopaths to love)
And although I have grown bored of her and doubt we will last the year. Thinking about sticking it out until I find someone better. Not to mention my family love her and have made plans years in advance with her, making this more awkward for me. I still care for her. I don't want to cause her the unhappiness she will feel when we break up as she still seems as infatuated as ever with me.
In terms of my anxiousness it doesn't effect me much, I hide it well, but my heart can beat fast at the most ridiculous things, which seems to be the opposite of sociopaths. Since I've realised this reaction however, I have slowly been cutting it out of my brain and fixing it.
I think I have explained everything I meant to. Hopefully I have because I just realised how much I wrote. So here comes the question... What am I? Sociopath. Psychopath (if there's even a difference) Autistic? The last one is becoming a more and more likely one in my mind. If you read all this. Well done.
I shall make sure that I burn those words into my brain, although I do think there are probably others I can learn, although I don't really want to learn anything, although it would be good to learn just in general.
Oh well suppose I'll have to try, although I probably won't.
To conclude
although although although although although although although although although although although although although .
Good morning/evening/night.
My family used to think I was psychopathic, after a lot of the things I did. But I'm really not, not in the true sense of the word.
Someone who's actually antisocial has the ability to feel sympathy for no one, without regard. Life is like some kind of game.. everything exists to be manipulated, and exploited. They, in a really profound way, give absolutely zero fucks.
The main difference between a sociopath and a psychopath, according to the internet, is that a psychopath is born with the no-sympathy trait, and a sociopath is created this way, by some form of abuse.
I don't think that acronym-hunting internet people really comprehend the full meaning of this. This means feeling no love for anything, anyone, at all - as the idiom goes, nothing in your heart.
Of course, I do things that the people think are sympathy-less, but at my core, I'm really am empath like the rest of them, the ones that sociopath-community people seem to so hate.
yes, sometimes my empathy switch seems to slip, and stagger. But underneath it's intact. There are a million reasons why I should do the things I do, and none of them even have anything to do with this acronym. These behaviors are probably better explained by another disorder I (probably) have.
Just look at this one guy I know... what an idiot, lol. He used to live here, and then he moved to Florida. He made some friends there, who went to a certain school. Then, his friends were talking about how there was a test tomorrow, and they weren't prepared. So guess what this guy does, he takes his phone and sends in a fake bomb threat to the school, so that his friends wouldn't have to take the test. Of course, he got caught, and now he's probably going to have to spend a couple decades in jail.
I'm like him, kind of. It's just that the chain of causes is way more complex, not simple..
Apparently, about one percent of the population meets the criteria for psychopathy. I find the people who are born like this somewhat interesting. What makes them tick??
Why so few?
Well, it's two in the morning so this post probably makes no sense to anyone but me. I should go to bed..