Message Turncoat in a DM to get moderator attention

Users Online(? lurkers):
10 / 12 posts

What mischief does he cause? (Fiction)


Posts: 1842

The scene is set in the summer. One boy is 16, he has a pretty strong idea of right and wrong, but things happens and he feels abandoned and slighted. He is talented in music and art and generally well spoken.

The other boy is 17, at the start acting quite dumb, and it comes out he doesn't really have many talents or a good head for studying. What he does have is a way of understanding what people think and a way to keep them close. He is for some mysterious way pleasant to be around.

Boy A is drawn to him, not really understanding why. As he tries to distance himself from boy B, B reacts in strange and maybe scary ways. How?

A is dragged further into the madness. How? What kind of things does B say? What kinds of things do they do together, knowing they are fairly young? A is more a thinker, but is dragged into B's thrill seeking because B "wants to feel alive".

There will be no murder, although maybe talk of it. Physical harm might happen. Explicit sexual things does not happen. (This is a young adult novel.)

Any input is appreciated because I am a little low on ideas for the mischief, I'm too brainfoggy for creating good dialogue and I guess some things must be said, and also I need stronger dynamics between the boys.

The story ends in fall. 

 

Posts: 1842
What mischief does he cause? (Fiction)

Both are seemingly healthy.

What I am interested in is how B is tying A closer to himself and the reaction when A tries to escape.

Also I want B to lure A to do things other than classic teen pranks like car theft.

Posts: 505
What mischief does he cause? (Fiction)

A is outwardly pretty lucky. He is middle class and has done a lot of things. Gone to college, had kids, travelled, experienced things.

B is outwardly not lucky. Has a bit less money, is a bit shyer and hasn't graduated from college. 

 

Actually...

A has ill health and a bucket list in his mind. He is moving quickly because he is made that way.

B is healthy and good looking. He doesn't have a bucket list. He has a way with people and he is in no hurry to slow down.

 

To be continued...

Posts: 1842
What mischief does he cause? (Fiction)

The setting is a medium big town, it has a surrounding of some abandoned houses, a lake and forests. There are some poorer areas but no real high crime ones and no gangs.

Posts: 408
What mischief does he cause? (Fiction)

If you decide on the external circumstances that would really help a lot. Like, is this in a summer camp, small village, bad neighbourhood...? The 'mischief' would have to fit the setting. Sounds like this would work better in some kind of intense environment where they can't really escape from each other, like a very small town or even a school or hospital. 

Posts: 5426
What mischief does he cause? (Fiction)

Is this for the Nanowrimo stuff?

If this is a young adult novel, I noticed they like fantasy/mystery plots, so you should go with that. Maybe the two teens investigate some strange happenings. Not saying it should be talking frogs, but too realistic stuff isn't that appreciated by young peeps these days. You know, escapism and all that.

Posts: 1842
What mischief does he cause? (Fiction)

Actually nice friend has an enemy from school. I think I will do something with that.

It must lead to some kind of letdown eventually, as bad friend has a problem keeping his less accepted traits hidden. Ideally something that bad kid does to good kid, but bad kid makes it comes across as good kid did it to him.

I have two days now. It will not be a problem once I have an idea. I have nothing else I need to do for those days.

Posts: 1842
What mischief does he cause? (Fiction)

It's done! Although sadly I'm 10,000 words short. :( Story is pretty much finished though.

Share? You gotta be kidding. ;)

Posts: 689
What mischief does he cause? (Fiction)

Congratulations. 

You're wise to not share. ;)

Posts: 505
What mischief does he cause? (Fiction)

 

by SensitiveSoul

Actually nice friend has an enemy from school. I think I will do something with that.

It must lead to some kind of letdown eventually, as bad friend has a problem keeping his less accepted traits hidden. Ideally something that bad kid does to good kid, but bad kid makes it comes across as good kid did it to him.

I have two days now. It will not be a problem once I have an idea. I have nothing else I need to do for those days.

 Well than write it and we will be happy to critique it.

10 / 12 posts
This site contains NSFW material. To view and use this site, you must be 18+ years of age.