Since the beginning of my arrival on these forums, I have been depicted as someone who is a liar. Perhaps that is because of my initial, but very brief cockiness - particularly about my education and my age. My age is something I've never said specifically - to anyone. My education is one of the top 5 most important things to me - it used to be number 1.
With the good parts of me I have admitted to the bad parts more. The truth is that I come from a home which had a very strange way of living life - and one that involved social isolation. It makes me very confused and I am insulted that I have been depicted as a liar when my life is nothing to envy. I don't go around like a narc saying "you should be me"
I don't pretend that I am perfect. I am happy with my life - I wake up every day perfectly content. Has it always been this way? No. Do I remember the details of when it wasn't? No. But that doesn't mean I am perfect. I will always be imperfect and I will always be trying to repair and relearn how to live. Humans are social creatures and I have to figure out all the time how to fix this. It is one of the hardest things I've ever done.
People on these forums have used me as a stepping stone to make themselves feel good about themselves. Do I think everyone that takes part of bashing me does this? No. But I know there are 1 or 2 folks who do. If they want what I have, they need to stop wasting their life away picking apart the past. That's all I have to say. I blame no one for the way my life is. I spend every day trying to rise out of my roots. If anyone wants to use me to delude themselves into thinking they are really "not that bad" at life - that is their choice.
I run the risk of my entire life being exposed on these parts. Everything that person knows about me. My age, my location, my employer (though I don't think that she knows my new employer). Do I like it? No. I don't. I value my privacy, but some where, some how...I made a mistake, and now here I am. I am more concerned about the way I was spoken to - and the fact that person thinks they can blackmail me. No one blackmails me and I hope she understands that when I have the time for her she will get it.
There is nothing on these websites that I wouldn't tell anyone in casual conversation...absolutely nothing. I have a philosophy in life. And it is tell everyone or tell no one.