I said that was a general scenario...meaning I can do that anywhere, Ed. When I’m at the gym I’m focusing on my workout. And living in LA almost everyone swings both ways, everyone uses each other it’s a fucking playground and I happen to be very good at spotting easy prey...it’s very difficult to explain but I can see a potential damaged good from a mile away (exaggeration). And I’m so good at picking up people that they don’t even notice I’m doing it. If you work out and it shows and some dude comes up to you and says “hey dude what gym do you go to? I the only one I go to is so and so miles away do you know of any closer ones?†That’s not someone hitting on you, but it’s a way to get the ball rolling. It’s the first step towards manipulation… It’s our most gifted trait…get with the program.
To answer your original question, yes, I have been in "love" with a sociopath. However, is it really love if you were manipulated into feeling it? was it all manipulation? Sometimes I think the sociopath really believes they "love" their target, but that they know it is short-termed and based upon a made up persona. Maybe they love the chase - like j's King Midas analogy. Anyway, for what it's worth it feels like a very intense co-dependency, very intense highs and lows, very few and fleeting "happy" moments, but they are what keep you coming back. It's awesome, sickening, exhausting. Eventually, I realized that I'm too old for that kind of intensity and that I needed companionship.
In my relationships with sociopaths, I didn't know they were until later. I don't know if I could actually fall in love with one knowing what he is. I know that I certainly like my sociopath friend that I have right now and that I did start to care for him until I figured out what never seemed right . . . But now, I think I can be attracted to him and genuinely like him, but I could never put my heart in his hands now.
If anyone is reading this, how bored are you?
You bring up an interesting topic when asking if it was ever love if you were manipulated into it. That's something I have spend a long time contimplating without ever reaching a real answer... the closest i can come up with is that reality is based on perception. perception on a subjective level IS reality. There for whether you were MADE to feel that way or it manifested out of chance, I'm not sure it matters... everything in nature comes down to choas, chance, evolutionary patterns. if we can breed a flower to be a certain color through selected genes, is that flower no longer longer of nature? is it somehow fake now? i do not think so. I think as we evolve as a species part of our path should be learning to weild and controll the world around us... a bit of sociopathic to think sure... but is wrong to think it? those in power are the ones who understand the kinetics of their environment... does it make them tyrants to use that knowledge? natural selection would say it merely makes them the most well adapted...
as to whether a sociopath believes they love their target... i imagine if they are doing a great job then they do on some level allow themselves to love... because such things will always feel off... if they do not allow themselves to assimilate that value into their mindset...
I agree with you. Regardless of manipulation vs true self, I did fall in love. It is love, however who or what I loved is the question.
I also agree that being able use manipulation without conscience is a powerful tool. Without the hinderance of conscience one can achieve great things for themselves. Sometimes others benefit, most times not, which is why most humans have a conscience - to promote the society.