for those of you who are into bdsm, do you think role play and general s&m activities might have something to do with a fear of intimacy?
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NO
it's one of the ultimate forms of intimacy.
for most Doms and Subs trust and communication plays a major role at all times.
how can you push the limits or know how to bring optimum Pleasure from Pain and "Humiliation" if you have a fear of intimacy or do not truly know or be willing to know your subject inside and out.
Prabbe, your ignorance disappoints me...
No. If anything, vanilla sex to me was less intimate. I couldn't just let go thanks to the lack of paraphelias being accounted for, I couldn't be 100% honest about my needs towards those who are intolerant of it, and it just felt robotic, boring, sub-par, even shitty at points. Pre-BDSM I just assumed that sex was nothing special, something people made more dramatic than necessary like most things in life. When a partner of mine is unwilling to go that extra mile alongside me, it ceases being intimate, but how eager I typically am to please has them usually feel bad if it's not somewhat reciprocal. Vanilla to me is only a small step above masturbating, something I just do to chill out, not something I enjoy really.
Being with a person who can't enjoy sex without being sadistic, it became the closest most honest relationship I have ever known. I can't enjoy sex without pain.
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