Sometimes walking the streets is like a heavy blanket drooping my psyche into the ground. Just looking at everyone, obliviousness. And there is tension, so deep in my stomach I have to look for it. And it bellows destruction. And I clench my fists, and I grind my teeth. And it spurs a rising upset I can hardly tolerate without tears of pressure release forcing their way out so that I don't scream. It is like an explosion, slow and constant like the sun. I must be careful not to sink too far into this truth. I might never come out again.
Poetry.
Don`t sink SayIt. Fly. Like an eagle.
Let me try. I'm not so good at it but gonna make an effort.
Firts the song:
When you arrive to a magical place full of people with thorns like roses.
You think, who are them? should I be among. ....... ?.
You find yourself amazed, why I'm so.... aroused.
They seemed like you, you wonder, are they your equals? then you decide to belong.
Their thorns say, "keep your distance".
But their beauty invites you to play with them.
You are amused watching them, so you come close.
But you are not like them and you get hurt.
The pain wakes on you an emotional overload.
Awaken a monster lying within .
Scorching your soul, with coldness indifference.
Releasing a burning fire.
Unable to feel anything but hatred.
The growing fire cannot be stopped.
You are that fire,
burning everything in your path.
But you feel cold because you are empty.
Their thorns have reached you heart
so many times before.
So now you are broken inside.
Then you are again, lost.. and alone...
And your memories come back
to makes your emptiness grow.
Keeping the wounds open.
No matter how many times you
change your shape to match with this world.
You don't belong here anymore.
You are just an outcast.
XXX
by FriendlyNeighbourDo you also feel physical ecstasy too? I'm on the verge of assault but , there's a kind of a wild joy also.
The boost of energy combined with the aggressive feeling is pleasurable, but it's also frustrating because there this intense desire to release it.
I don't experience wild joy with it, no.