Oh yea? Because the guy has to be afraid of you for apologising? Well sorry you don't scare me.
Fuck face
Curious > "Is the motivation for doing something nice for someone still just to see them happy?"
Not at all. The motivation to do something 'nice' is about building or maintaining the foundation to manipulate someone. Trying to understand an SP by looking at them through your own lens won't work. Their emotions are shallow and people are like assets to them to be used when and how best needed. Aim to keep your emotional attachment just as shallow. They will come and go from your life as they need things.
How about if someone does nice things for complete strangers who they will probably never encounter again. Would that mean that someone isn't a sociopath, regardless of how many other things point to them being one? Correct me if I'm wrong, but I don't think an actual sociopath would find a reason to do such things.
When I do "good things" then for getting "good things" back.
It was in last school, I told others the right answer at a test and I got their homeworks instead.
But sometimes I've done good things, beacuse I like to play. For example: The unknown girl who went before me in the city lost a banknote and I gave it back to her.
Then we talked and I told her lies, it was just for fun.
It doesn't matter if the others are happy.
by CuriousEmpathHow about if someone does nice things for complete strangers who they will probably never encounter again. Would that mean that someone isn't a sociopath, regardless of how many other things point to them being one? Correct me if I'm wrong, but I don't think an actual sociopath would find a reason to do such things.
Narcissism...lol...
In the book The Fall by Camus the narrator used to do nice things because he liked the way it made him look lol...He used to help blind people cross the street then tip his hat to them lol even though they were blind and couldn't see...it was for the benefit of his audience which was society lol...
Then he had his existential crisis and realized he didn't actually give a fuck about anything and it was all pointless...lol...
Dear CE: the same way karma may cause unexpected things to occur to people (through unsuspecting people you may not expect) in order for them to get their justice, it may also be that people who had good things coming to them get these from people you'd least expect either. sometimes it is about the receiver, not the giver.
the best thing to do is focus on what you do "unconditionally". it is always better not to attach expectations. so whatever reasons your friend may be acting upon, it doesn't change the way you would act, either way. so you don't get hurt by giving or taking out of balance.
I think your friend is lucky to have a friend like you who cares enough to ask and understand
Thank you for the nice response
As for expectation management, it's usually very hard to not have some sort of expectations. I can try to not attach expectations, but for me, it's typically a lot easier to just try to adjust them based on trends I notice. What I do unconditionally for one person can also be different than what I do unconditionally for another, and can eventually change depending on the same kinds of things that can cause my expectations to change. I feel like that's the only way for me to truly avoid too much giving or taking out of balance.
Just wondering, in reference to what you said about focusing on what I do unconditionally, do you think it's better to adjust what you give based on what someone else does? Or do you think it's better to try to keep it truly unconditional regardless of who the other person is and what they give/take? I'm not quite sure I understood you correctly.