so there's this guy in university who all these girls have a crush on but he takes them for granted.... he ignores his friends, does whatever he wants at the expense of others, breaks promises to his friends, and apologizes to no end but keeps doing the same things. However, he is very charming and girls continue to fall in love with him. For example, when I'm with him, he laughs at all my jokes and is very charismatic. He makes me feel like I've found my soul mate. He's the one person I can share tactics for cheating on homework with without feeling judged and actually feeling proud, for example - and although he seems sweet and innocent on the surface, he's not afraid to make really obscene jokes, which I also like. However, I know he has this effect on everyone, and I know he doesn't truly like me or care about me because he ignores my attempts to contact him. After it became clear to me his charm is only skin deep, I don't have a crush on him anymore. But I have been toying with the idea of manipulating someone into falling in love with me just to see if I can do it, and I think the emotional detachment might actually work to my advantage because I won't be afraid to experiment with new tactics. He is a manipulator himself, so it will also be a challenge to manipulate him. I was wondering if anyone who also likes psychology would have any tips for me to get his attention, and stand out for him. A lot of girls are just really sweet to him, and others are mean to get his attention, but neither of these things work. I would especially like advice from male sociopaths who know how to be charming, since I think that is what he is. how could a woman make you fall in love with her?
tantilize him and tease him with the concept of your affection, and sex without ever giving it to him. simply be what he wants without giving him what he wants, simply do not allow him to possess you... the hardest part will be your ability to control yourself. taking both of you to the edge of exctasy without the climax i call this tantric flirtation. the concept is to always leave them wanting... more. letting them see the promise of paradice and your ability to give it to them, without ever giving it.
Hi CC the best way to create an unwavering connection with someone is to care about their soul, their well being, and happiness/success in all relationships equally and unconditionally. If you love people with the highest most noble and most humble love possible, then that trumps all else. No one can resist this kind of love.
When you discover you can love people this way, that is the only love you want to share because you absolutely cannot get hurt this way. It is the only way to love people safely. If you can love your friend this way, you won't have to manipulate anything. You call on this level of love, and all the answers you need, what to say and do will come to you because this love wants to be known and express itself.
Love for lovesake is the greatest love of all, yet it will seem at times the meekest.
Be completely honest, forgiving, accepting and understanding. Do not put any one person or interest above others, but place equal priority on the well being of all people and all relations, and this kind of higher love will flow through.
If you want to be "in control" then be the first person in the circle of friends around this guy to bring this love among all of you. Anyone who is trying to be manipulative may fear you're pulling all the strings, when it is true love doing all that, if you are the one person NOT acting for selfish reasons but caring for all.
When you have no manipulative or selfish motive, when you are truly acting out of selfless concern for others, your insights will be more pure and powerful, because you waste no energy in seeking to abuse knowledge for other reasons.
You will rise above the rest by having no such side motive or tainted thoughts.
BTW why ask ppl who don't know this guy what interests him? Why not get to know him, find out or ask him what he's interested in? How would you normally get to know a friend. Wouldn't you ask him or his friends?
If you want to know the areas where ppl can be "manipulated" -- if there's any unresolved issues they have with their parents, these patterns tend to repeat in relationships especially romantic ones. So if they had control issues with dad, these can surface as "authority or control issues." if they have issues with mom or family, these affect ppl's "communication." These are areas that determine which people we connect with who 'help us to break or grow out of old patterns'
So if you are helpful to someone's growth, you may connect in those areas. If you don't help in any meaningful way, they will connect with someone who does.
What is this guy studying? What kinds of material does he write or read about? Does he play sports, or follow shows on TV or movies? Does he debate religion or politics? Any world issues or current events he is particular concerned with?