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maintainig a relationship


Posts: 1

I have a situation.

Don't think I'm a sociopath, but I recently found many similarities between how a sociopath's brain works and my own, and therefore consider your possible answer as appropriate to me and the way my mind functions.

I feel stuck in a relationship that doesn't always give me what I want. I usually cut all the ties without ever looking back when I got bored, pretty soon after the connection was made,  CBA easy to use - I preffered (and prefer) a pleasant loneliness to a complicated relationship. This time's a bit different. He is a genius, of course, otherwise I wouldn't have felt attracted to him, but he neglects his talents in favor of staying with me, which renders him unable to share that knowledge and therefore maintain my interest. Though I hide it, knowing it would hurt him and bother me later, I'd much rather spend my hours reading and going out by myself instead of pretending to be involved in an endless talk about him, about be, about plans for the future.

The reason I'm writing here is to find any solutions for me keeping this person but not investing that much. Should he know how I think, he'd stop sepnding time with me, and I partly need to learn the piano, in which he's an asset, an extraordinary musician.

Maybe I'm trying to convince myself I'm not a sociopath and able to maintain a lasting relationship. Maybe I am consious of the fact that he killing himself after loosing me or finding out I need him less than he needs me, will be a bothering thought. However, I want to maintain the person, but the thing has become unsustainable for me.

[ in case my english might seem awkward - not a native speaker ]

Waiting for thoughts.

Posts: 3110
maintainig a relationship

 youre right. Your not a sociopath.

There is a name/term for your condition though. 

Posts: 5426
maintainig a relationship

 Tell the dude you're not that much into him. If you do it properly, and are 100% honest with him, he won't kill himself. He'll get over you. The longer you postpone the breakup and feed him false hope, the more difficult it will be to break up with him.

Posts: 178
maintainig a relationship

 Coming from the person who can't use proper grammar... seriously.. people like you are the FUCKING BANE of the Internet.. Right next to Russians on LOL

Posts: 3110
maintainig a relationship

 WTF are you smoking wile?

Posts: 1156
maintainig a relationship

 I think the problem is he is not smoking enough.

Posts: 1259
maintainig a relationship

In his defense, you did misspell "you're" twice in a row.

Posts: 1156
maintainig a relationship

 We all carry the traits. Sounds like you are concerned about being selfish. If your not having fun or getting something out of the relationship, then walk away. If you are, he's a big boy and can take care of himself.

Posts: 1156
maintainig a relationship

 your mean

Posts: 1259
maintainig a relationship

No, I'm not. As a delicate individual that struggles immensely with English I feel I have the unequivocal right to take personal offense when people butcher the language, and I consequently stand wholeheartedly behind Wilechaser's moral outrage.

10 / 19 posts
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