One time this woman was parked directly behind my car, waiting for me to move away from the fueling station so she could take my place, and use the fueling station herself.
-setting, Miami Florida, mid-summer, 130 degrees, the hot sun baking everyone alive-
Naturally, I backed up to wiggle my way out of the spot completely unaware of the fact this car was behind me. In fact, she was positioned perfectly in my blind spot, so I had no idea she existed- until I hit her bumper.
Immediately she got out of her car and started screaming at me. I got out my car, and stood face to face with her- within inches of this woman, in hysterics, spitting on me.
Me being the complete sociopath that I am, have no reaction. And just stand there without moving, not really knowing which facial expression I'm supposed to have in this situation, or rather what would be the appropriate face. So I just sort of-
Do this face.
Twenty minutes later, she's still yelling and at this point I'm thinking about what I'll be having for dinner this evening. She begins to realize I'm very emotionally unaffected and sort of smiling, which makes her even angrier at me. And she tells me to wipe the smirk off my face, asks me if this is funny to me, and says something about the fact that a baby is in her vehicle which I could of harmed.
Keep in mind, I tapped her car. There was zero damage. I was going under 1mph. The impact's effect was less than that of a soccer ball hitting her bumper.
I glance at the vehicle and see no signs of life in the car, nor a car seat, or any indication that there was ever anyone else in this vehicle, particularly a baby. No diaper bags, nothing. It was completely empty- and very clean I might add.
At which point, I- very calmly say,
"Ma'am, there's no baby in the vehicle."
And she continues screaming over me, not really noticing that my mouth is moving.
I'm looking around at this point wondering, where the baby at. And I try to interrupt again, "Ma'am, there's no baby in the vehicle. I think, I think someone made have, stolen your baby."
At this point she takes her phone out of her pocket and gets really angry at her husband on the phone.
And I'm still standing there watching her have this complete mental break down just feeling bad for whoever is married to this train wreck of a woman at this point, the fact he has to deal with this crazy son of a bitch. Why anyone would marry anyone like this got me really messed up.
Finally she starts cussing me out in hysterics and begins to make her exist speech I suppose
Then she gets back in her car and drives away giving me this menacing look, without taking any of my information. She never filed any police report or insurance claims.
All I said through the entire exchange was, "ma'am, I think someone has stolen your baby."
I got back in the car and my friend, who was waiting in the passengers seat the entire time this whole ordeal went on. Was just like-
