Is wanting to taste blood to feel the same rush that my head feels from the memories of the shooting amplified so wrong? I wake up from nightmares of the shooting but intertwining with the pain I feel something beautiful that I don't quite understand. I have seen death both in peace and on violence. The violence makes me feel alive. I can't stop looking at videos Lauren of people dying and I wonder if this is who I am or if something is broken about me. I have thoughts about the people around me and it makes me feel like I am an evil person. In all honesty this is who/what I am. And I want to communicate it to you but I don't know how and I don't feel worthy of love and that includes your love. Boss Chris amplified all of it times 10. He amplified everything I already felt before and now I'm stuck and I can't turn back . I mean I can't sleep when I try to sleep I see the images behind my eyelids . Do you really want to be with a broken soul? Hahahahahaha knock knock
who's there
Broken
Broken who?
Broken is you. Broken is me. Binding us is what sets us free. I saw your leg bleeding at the park that day and I can't stop thinking about it but at the same time I want to protect you like the delicate little rose you are and that makes me hate myself because I don't want to taint your beautiful petals with my illness . Wouldn't want to LEAF a stain on those pretty little petals of yours now would I? I wear colourful patterns but inside I feel grey like ash on the tip of the tongue of a sinner