When I think about it, I don't particularly dislike you Nate. I actually enjoy your persistent bullshit, and I'll probably never find anyone else that plays the same mind games as you do.
Spatial Mind said:
We're talking about resilience.
I wrote a piece back then called The Process of Self Transformation. It's an opportunity for real change, except it's only for better or worse. Worst, if transformation for the better doesn't happen, and it literally starts with knowing what to desire It's not desiring the impossible, it's desiring what we need and it'll be possible if we need it to be.
Something traumatic happens and it's really messing with the subject mentally like an endless nightmare. It's then the subject is 'forced' to make changes to their ego for better or worse. Better if they can overcome it, and worse if they remain stuck with a situation that cannot be undone. I knew a woman who never got over her Father's death, DECADES later, and she keeps this old car she can't afford to fix and it's a real burden on her as it's rusting away. I wonder if she even still has it.
I don't mean to cast insults to anyone, but when people commit suicide, it's because they lacked wisdom and deserve no respect, while those who been through the same thing and overcome it, are very wise and deserve/command respect simply by being able to sleep at night.
A resilient character who been to hell and back worries less about bad things happening as opposed to someone who has little to no experience with trauma. While it's never pleasant, to one who had a beautiful transformation harsh shit hurts less.
Exactly, it's about resilience, and without that a person crumbles in the face of adversity. Imo, suicide is the ultimate act of cowardice and weakness, unless the person is terminal and the suffering becomes too much. It's justified then, evidenced by liberal euthanasia laws in many countries. Although that too is becoming tainted by a worrying aspect of the woke mind virus infecting the western world.
Did you put this 'The Process of Self Transformation' here on this forum? I'm curious. Tried substring searching titles and posts but not sure the search function actually works. You always had such an opposite world view to me. I drove myself nuts for a while trying to change your mind on a few things until suddenly I saw things from a very different perspective. There's something essential about that, when it comes to letting go.
last edit on
9/18/2025 12:22:16 PM
Spatial Mind said:
We're talking about resilience.
I wrote a piece back then called The Process of Self Transformation. It's an opportunity for real change, except it's only for better or worse. Worst, if transformation for the better doesn't happen, and it literally starts with knowing what to desire It's not desiring the impossible, it's desiring what we need and it'll be possible if we need it to be.
Something traumatic happens and it's really messing with the subject mentally like an endless nightmare. It's then the subject is 'forced' to make changes to their ego for better or worse. Better if they can overcome it, and worse if they remain stuck with a situation that cannot be undone. I knew a woman who never got over her Father's death, DECADES later, and she keeps this old car she can't afford to fix and it's a real burden on her as it's rusting away. I wonder if she even still has it.
I don't mean to cast insults to anyone, but when people commit suicide, it's because they lacked wisdom and deserve no respect, while those who been through the same thing and overcome it, are very wise and deserve/command respect simply by being able to sleep at night.
A resilient character who been to hell and back worries less about bad things happening as opposed to someone who has little to no experience with trauma. While it's never pleasant, to one who had a beautiful transformation harsh shit hurts less.
Exactly, it's about resilience, and without that a person crumbles in the face of adversity. Imo, suicide is the ultimate act of cowardice and weakness, unless the person is terminal and the suffering becomes too much. It's justified then, evidenced by liberal euthanasia laws in many countries. Although that too is becoming tainted by a worrying aspect of the woke mind virus infecting the western world.
I believe that. Friend of mine, her aunt flew to Europe to get euthanized from excessive arthritic pain. A year later her Uncle went and did it. That was juuuust before they started doing that here. Over here I think you can have it done just for saying life sucks.
Did you put this 'The Process of Self Transformation' here on this forum? I'm curious. Tried substring searching titles and posts but not sure the search function actually works. You always had such an opposite world view to me. I drove myself nuts for a while trying to change your mind on a few things until suddenly I saw things from a very different perspective. There's something essential about that, when it comes to letting go.
As mentioned I wrote it back then on the old nabble forum. While I have a lot of images from that period of time, I'll probably have a hard time locating the notepad I pasted it on. The nabble forum went down a few years ago, it was there for the better part of the past decade.
Must've also wrote it 3 months after arriving on ME's forum. If you recall I was heartbroken when I arrived. It was like my mind was attacking my heart simply by thinking about her and what happened. It was giving me endless adrenaline rushes which caused a lot of friction giving me real physical pain. Very sharp beeping pain. I'd even go as far as saying it was worse than mourning death. Heartbreak is so mental and physical.
Eventually started saying to myself how I don't deserve this, saying no to the pain. How it's better not to worry about something like that, then in 3 months I broke my previous heartbreak record and was able to stand tall. I think SW made me callous as I decided to stick around and be the forum football while this was happening.
I wrote the Process of Self Transformation talking about ego death. Once I got the result, that is total transformation of the self one can say I was happier in the furnace. And I kid you not, there I also coined the term "Better version of yourself" and now it's a phrase everyone heard. I so invented that.
My final diagnosis is she is what it called a "fearful avoidant personality" which is someone who feels insecure being close to people they love. It happens from childhood when their emotional concerns are dismissed by their parents so they find comfort being reclusive. If you look it up you'll find people going on and on about it. She comes and goes, and never called her in 12+ years actually, I do that for my safety, she comes back I take the call. Though last time I had to cut it off, as her condition doesn't mean I should be disrespected. It's the road to madness, and I still like her.
What I became is wiser and it was at that time I realized a man can't love a woman the way he wants to, even though this wasn't an ordinary case. I see people saying things to others like "Just be yourself, and love will work out" and I'm like fuck no. Transform. We must transform. And if you get her stay on your toes.
Another thing I mentioned, is how after understanding the process of self transformation, we can find light at the end of the tunnel knowing the process is ALWAYS painful, but we can cope knowing we're going to transform again and with knowledge the way isn't against the currents.
The Process of Self Transformation is always presented as a rare opportunity. Yes rare. And it is a choice we make. If the choice to change isn't made it'll eat away at us.
Sure we can change our minds or strive to do better at any time, but that's nothing compared to the events where ego death and rebirth is mandatory. That's when we'll never be the same again as gong back to how we used to be simply isn't an option. When we mourn for someone, it's really our ego death. No more performing routines or behaviors with the ones who are no longer with us, and we do get over it, Maybe once in a blue moon we'll kinda fall back but that's okay. Falling back is a way of affirmation.
There's this one member here, she has multiple account names. She keeps chasing this guy. Been years. She gives him thousands of dollars trying to buy him. I warned her about this, now she makes threats to get a lawyer, then comes begging to see him again. Seems hopeless, no comfort, she wants a family but look like she won't be getting one, because she refuses to let him go, meanwhile he treats her like she and wants nothing to do with her. Transformation for better or worse. I don't think she'll regret wasting so much time chasing phantoms in her deathbed, but rather set blame. Happens when one is hard headed and allows the ego that no longer serves to survive.
Of course, I remember that thread on the old forum. Wasn't that the one that exceeded the max capacity of a thread and actually broke the forum for a little while after someone spliced another long thread onto it? I just tried to see if I could find it archived but can't remember the url or find it. Anyway, it's a shame you don't have it at hand. I'm surprised. It was such an inspired way to process your trauma. Do you think you had some kind of kundalini awakening or event that was triggered at that time? Some of those experiences sound like that.
I remember a woman you mention posting the pursuit of a man who treats her like a fly - she was on the old forum in the last year or so, wasn't she? Or is that another one? This one was quite deranged with her obsession. She thought every sock was him and would lose her mind yet again.
Of course, I remember that thread on the old forum. Wasn't that the one that exceeded the max capacity of a thread and actually broke the forum for a little while after someone spliced another long thread onto it? I just tried to see if I could find it archived but can't remember the url or find it. Anyway, it's a shame you don't have it at hand. I'm surprised. It was such an inspired way to process your trauma. Do you think you had some kind of kundalini awakening or event that was triggered at that time? Some of those experiences sound like that.
I remember a woman you mention posting the pursuit of a man who treats her like a fly - she was on the old forum in the last year or so, wasn't she? Or is that another one? This one was quite deranged with her obsession. She thought every sock was him and would lose her mind yet again.
Who are you exactly
I remember a woman you mention posting the pursuit of a man who treats her like a fly - she was on the old forum in [Edit:] in its [slash Edit] last year or so, wasn't she? Or is that another one? This one was quite deranged with her obsession. She thought every sock was him and would lose her mind yet again.
Of course, I remember that thread on the old forum. Wasn't that the one that exceeded the max capacity of a thread and actually broke the forum for a little while after someone spliced another long thread onto it? I just tried to see if I could find it archived but can't remember the url or find it. Anyway, it's a shame you don't have it at hand. I'm surprised. It was such an inspired way to process your trauma. Do you think you had some kind of kundalini awakening or event that was triggered at that time? Some of those experiences sound like that.
I remember a woman you mention posting the pursuit of a man who treats her like a fly - she was on the old forum in the last year or so, wasn't she? Or is that another one? This one was quite deranged with her obsession. She thought every sock was him and would lose her mind yet again.
Who are you exactly
Clearly, no one you know.
Of course, I remember that thread on the old forum. Wasn't that the one that exceeded the max capacity of a thread and actually broke the forum for a little while after someone spliced another long thread onto it? I just tried to see if I could find it archived but can't remember the url or find it. Anyway, it's a shame you don't have it at hand. I'm surprised. It was such an inspired way to process your trauma.
To be honest I can't remember if it was that particular thread that glitched out so I converted it to a vlog. It probably was.
Do you think you had some kind of kundalini awakening or event that was triggered at that time? Some of those experiences sound like that.
Now that you mention it, by the definition of what the kundalini awakening is and entails, that's exactly what it was.
I remember a woman you mention posting the pursuit of a man who treats her like a fly - she was on the old forum in [Edit:] in its [slash Edit] last year or so, wasn't she? Or is that another one? This one was quite deranged with her obsession. She thought every sock was him and would lose her mind yet again.
It's another one. The one you're talking about, I think she called herself Batshitcrazy, or that's what everyone else called her.
Spatial Mind said:
We're talking about resilience.
I wrote a piece back then called The Process of Self Transformation. It's an opportunity for real change, except it's only for better or worse. Worst, if transformation for the better doesn't happen, and it literally starts with knowing what to desire It's not desiring the impossible, it's desiring what we need and it'll be possible if we need it to be.
Something traumatic happens and it's really messing with the subject mentally like an endless nightmare. It's then the subject is 'forced' to make changes to their ego for better or worse. Better if they can overcome it, and worse if they remain stuck with a situation that cannot be undone. I knew a woman who never got over her Father's death, DECADES later, and she keeps this old car she can't afford to fix and it's a real burden on her as it's rusting away. I wonder if she even still has it.
I don't mean to cast insults to anyone, but when people commit suicide, it's because they lacked wisdom and deserve no respect, while those who been through the same thing and overcome it, are very wise and deserve/command respect simply by being able to sleep at night.
A resilient character who been to hell and back worries less about bad things happening as opposed to someone who has little to no experience with trauma. While it's never pleasant, to one who had a beautiful transformation harsh shit hurts less.
Exactly, it's about resilience, and without that a person crumbles in the face of adversity. Imo, suicide is the ultimate act of cowardice and weakness, unless the person is terminal and the suffering becomes too much. It's justified then, evidenced by liberal euthanasia laws in many countries. Although that too is becoming tainted by a worrying aspect of the woke mind virus infecting the western world.
Did you put this 'The Process of Self Transformation' here on this forum? I'm curious. Tried substring searching titles and posts but not sure the search function actually works. You always had such an opposite world view to me. I drove myself nuts for a while trying to change your mind on a few things until suddenly I saw things from a very different perspective. There's something essential about that, when it comes to letting go.
"self transforming" into an ugly old hag, congrats
Go tell a homeless marine how him being a marine was good for his mental health.