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My husband is accusing my neighbor of faking autism


Posts: 2669

Idk what to make of it

He wrote them this- hope it all posts it's super super long?

Hey Babs, for a person with autism... You sure have have been unsympathetic and misunderstanding of somebody going through struggles obviously caused by their autism.

 

 You know, such as not realizing it when she's barging into a conversation (autism symptom), randomly bringing up her specific interests (autism symptom), and having difficulty managing her emotions under social stress (autism symptom), and freaking out over hand washing (autism symptom). Ect. Surely you understand why she struggles with all that, didn't you deal with it yourself through your life? 

 

I mean, Jason yelled at her to 'shut the fuck up' through our wall when she wasn't doing anything wrong and she responded much like an autistic person would respond to something like that. He also made fun of her for her past of hitting her head as a child (autism symptom) which she has sustained head injuries from to this day, which is why she got so angry and shouted back at him. Not to mention making fun of her being institutionalized for autism in the past. But apparently that's your 'last straw'. She actually got so upset that day that she took herself to the ER for mental health, which you should get as I understand you sometimes have to do this too. They decided to keep her there overnight, so it absolutely was not for attention... take it from the person who literally accompanied her there and had to deal with it. She kept crying about how she upset you when she got angry at Jason, not that you care.

 

You know, you're extremely socially savvy, and I've seen you pick up on plenty of social cues and participate in group conversations just fine, like the way you told Jasmine that you keep mostly quiet in the group of men; something my wife doesn't know to do and therefore suffers social repercussions. 

 

I also noticed you're incredibly indirect about your feelings... Like putting a sign about 'boundaries' on your door or writing things on the board without talking to her or storming around the kitchen all angrily with headphones on, scowling stomping and slamming things... all when my wife was trying to have a conversation with Tylor for the last time before she moves. And the way you handled Diana when the police were there... she didn't even notice that you weren't on her side and you made her chill out, good job. Very socially intelligent. 

 

I am impressed that you've gotten along so well with a guy like Steve. He's like the epitome of neurotypical. The guy is extremely passive aggressive, pompous, and underhanded with his words. It's pretty hard for me and Jasmine to talk to him due to our neurodivergence problems. But I've seen you laugh along with him many times, including at my wife's expense. It flew over Jasmine's head most of the time, but I'm a bit higher functioning so I noticed ;)

 

By the way, it's kind of odd how you talk in a baby voice on purpose and go on about how you 'never stopped being a child'. Jasmine actually struggles to do well in her adult life because people treat her like a child due to her autism struggles and actually would like to get away from that harmful stereotype.. it's interesting that you lean into it. 

 

And how come you flapped your arms in Starbucks on the bon dance night? I've never seen you do that before at any other point for the 10 months we've been here. If Starbucks triggers that reaction in you, then shouldn't a bon dance and heavy traffic also trigger that too? From what I know people can't exactly choose what noise triggers their overload, it's just the raw noise coming in from all sides, which is why my wife doesn't even drive because of her sensory issues and had a really hard time not getting overstimulated at that bon dance. She actually put gum in her ears and it was still too loud for her.

 

Babs, I know the truth hurts but I just gotta tell it to you straight- being an introverted cat lady who calls herself a 

 witch and purposely baby talks and wants to be a child forever does not make you autistic. I believe you've been misdiagnosed. Now, you could make the argument that you're just older and had time to get better with your 'autism' struggles, but if that were the case you would have sympathy for my (actually autistic) wife, as I pointed out above and if you are autistic which I highly doubt, that would make your actions even worse because you should have sympathy for an autistic girl nearly a third of your age struggling with it after having a MISCARRIAGE (like you sadly did.)

 

So do all of us actual autistic people a favor and quit pretending you have a disability you clearly don't have, as you enable people like Steve and Jason and Jon to be rude to people who ACTUALLY have struggles with it. You are part of the problem with this world, and you can deny this and keep on going with the act but take it from a real person with the problem- it's disgusting, it's fake, and it's damaging. I know it's a part of your identity, but you're lying to yourself... an autistic person doesn't diagnose their cats with autism.

 

At least my wife is able to escape this joke and move onto job corps where she can actually move on with her life, which she has spent five years trying to get into and had to get a lawyer to because she is (actually autistic). 

 

Jasmine didn't want me to send this message to you because she actually really cares about you, and doesn't possess the social skills to see what I see- but I see your bullshit for what it is. That's all I have to say to you, and I will not be talking to you for the remainder of my time here. It's not too late to apologize to Jasmine however, she leaves tomorrow morning.

 

Word of the year- NEUROTYPICAL

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Posts: 2669
0 votes RE: My husband is accusing my neighbor of faking autism

I mean tbh, I never actually realized a lot of these things. But come to think of it I think he might be right, how could I have been so fucking stupid?

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Posts: 33190
0 votes RE: My husband is accusing my neighbor of faking autism

Not all autism is the same, or it could be aspergers. 

Pretty mean to pick on autistic people like that like some sort of elitist, for shame. The guy sounds like she got to him first, inspiring him to respond like he was triggered by... a witch themed cat lady? 

There's clearly more going on here, this post makes it look like he's the one flipping out. 

Ę̵̚x̸͎̾i̴͚̽s̵̻͐t̷͐ͅe̷̯͠n̴̤̚t̵̻̅i̵͉̿a̴̮͊l̵͍̂ ̴̹̕D̵̤̀e̸͓͂t̵̢͂e̴͕̓c̸̗̄t̴̗̿ï̶̪v̷̲̍é̵͔
last edit on 9/4/2023 4:12:49 PM
Posts: 2669
0 votes RE: My husband is accusing my neighbor of faking autism

Not all autism is the same, or it could be aspergers. 

Pretty mean to pick on autistic people like that like some sort of elitist, for shame. The guy sounds like she got to him first, inspiring him to respond like he was triggered by... a witch themed cat lady? 

There's clearly more going on here, this post makes it look like he's the one flipping out. 

 I'm gonna be honest and yeah I considered what you are saying until I read this over oh god (a bunch of times) sat down, calmed down, and really really thought about it. 

And my pride didn't want me to believe this. In fact I like this woman so I was a bit biased in her favor

 

And I realized although not all autism is the same as you are saying, autism (including it's masking which is an argument that can be made for people especially women who don't "act" autistic) has symptoms. It at the end of the day is a diagnostic criteria and a physical brain wiring you can see in a person under a scan with excessive synapses and all. And I thought about much of what he is saying here and it is true. And yes she calls herself a witch cat lady which he is making fun of her for this isn't even an insult he's giving her it came out of her own mouth but anyway I'm rambling. 

Consider the possibility this woman is faking which sadly yes there are people out there who do 

A lot of what br is saying is true and he makes many good points I haven't considered. Yes autism can look like a lot of things - but there's a line somewhere and sadly autism has been dragged into identity politics and no one will consider the possibility some people really are full of it. Like really look at his arguments and ignore his anger or statements that may seem odd without context, look at his actual examples and think about them.

And ask yourself "let's assume this is true, is it evidence?" 

Being in a wheelchair can look like a lot of things too, like a person in a wheelchair won't get up and run 50 miles without crutches or anything like a normal person

But sadly invisible disabilities can be watered down and shoved into identity politics making people less willing to call bs. 

And you can say "oh you are not a doctor" but due to life situations, reading multiple books and studies, ect, (having autism yourself doesn't make you an expert I am aware) autism is one of the very few things I have expert knowledge of which you can test me on, right down to what the wiring variations in the brain can look like, and if someone is faking I can tell if I knew that person well enough and long enough. And we live in the same house as this woman btw. 

And I understand some points br made that can be argued with 

For example he gets on her about a chair being moved and her violently flapping her arms over it, he states it's all just "raw noise" but autistic people can be more sensitive to some forms of noise than others 

However her exchanging glances at people and communicating entirely with her face to the point where she can laugh on cue, say things accordingly ect? Autistic people CANNOT do that. Maybe to a certain degree they can pretend to through masking but only so far and not the way she does it. Like there have been situations where a person she doesn't even know says a implied two words, she won't know what they mean and then she will see their face and go OH. and this isn't enough evidence on it's own but this is just one small example and I am aware this is a complicated topic 

Another example is her baby talking in fact baby talking is a well known common symptom for people who fake autism. It doesn't mean they do, but it is one of the things people who do that often do. 

And also, she has been extremely inconsistent with her symptoms, I have seen this woman have an airhorn put in her ear, while she laughed it off and continued to socially interact and stay out by choice happily with no responses, talking up a storm like the social butterfly she is for the entire day without breaks. Every day. For like a week.  yet uncontrollably flap her arms dramatically ONE TIME in a year in public over someone picking up a small chair and moving it for a second. And we have hung out at the same place before multiple times and when the employees would move a chair all those other times she never reacted or cared not once. 

A huge red flag br didn't point out, is she has inconsistent stories about when she was diagnosed, what level her functioning is diagnosed at, and what form of autism she has. 

Like last night when I posted this I was upset but after I went and thought about it and witnessed what I have been witnessing I realized there is a very strong possibility br is actually right here. 

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last edit on 9/4/2023 4:42:05 PM
Posts: 33190
0 votes RE: My husband is accusing my neighbor of faking autism

Honestly it just looks like your hubby got triggered by someone, then pulled an elitist call out when he himself is not even on the spectrum. 

Ę̵̚x̸͎̾i̴͚̽s̵̻͐t̷͐ͅe̷̯͠n̴̤̚t̵̻̅i̵͉̿a̴̮͊l̵͍̂ ̴̹̕D̵̤̀e̸͓͂t̵̢͂e̴͕̓c̸̗̄t̴̗̿ï̶̪v̷̲̍é̵͔
Posts: 323
0 votes RE: My husband is accusing my neighbor of faking autism

Sounds kinda fake. Who violently flaps their arms in response to mild stimuli into adulthood? Autists don't tend to be good at deeply "triggering" people, they usually get more immediate and devastating responses from neurotypicals or personal hate from them and psychopaths or even other autists but that's not the same thing. 

last edit on 9/15/2023 7:16:31 AM
Posts: 34
0 votes RE: My husband is accusing my neighbor of faking autism
Delora said: 

Not all autism is the same, or it could be aspergers. 

Pretty mean to pick on autistic people like that like some sort of elitist, for shame. The guy sounds like she got to him first, inspiring him to respond like he was triggered by... a witch themed cat lady? 

There's clearly more going on here, this post makes it look like he's the one flipping out. 

 I'm gonna be honest and yeah I considered what you are saying until I read this over oh god (a bunch of times) sat down, calmed down, and really really thought about it. 

And my pride didn't want me to believe this. In fact I like this woman so I was a bit biased in her favor

 

And I realized although not all autism is the same as you are saying, autism (including it's masking which is an argument that can be made for people especially women who don't "act" autistic) has symptoms. It at the end of the day is a diagnostic criteria and a physical brain wiring you can see in a person under a scan with excessive synapses and all. And I thought about much of what he is saying here and it is true. And yes she calls herself a witch cat lady which he is making fun of her for this isn't even an insult he's giving her it came out of her own mouth but anyway I'm rambling. 

Consider the possibility this woman is faking which sadly yes there are people out there who do 

A lot of what br is saying is true and he makes many good points I haven't considered. Yes autism can look like a lot of things - but there's a line somewhere and sadly autism has been dragged into identity politics and no one will consider the possibility some people really are full of it. Like really look at his arguments and ignore his anger or statements that may seem odd without context, look at his actual examples and think about them.

And ask yourself "let's assume this is true, is it evidence?" 

Being in a wheelchair can look like a lot of things too, like a person in a wheelchair won't get up and run 50 miles without crutches or anything like a normal person

But sadly invisible disabilities can be watered down and shoved into identity politics making people less willing to call bs. 

And you can say "oh you are not a doctor" but due to life situations, reading multiple books and studies, ect, (having autism yourself doesn't make you an expert I am aware) autism is one of the very few things I have expert knowledge of which you can test me on, right down to what the wiring variations in the brain can look like, and if someone is faking I can tell if I knew that person well enough and long enough. And we live in the same house as this woman btw. 

And I understand some points br made that can be argued with 

For example he gets on her about a chair being moved and her violently flapping her arms over it, he states it's all just "raw noise" but autistic people can be more sensitive to some forms of noise than others 

However her exchanging glances at people and communicating entirely with her face to the point where she can laugh on cue, say things accordingly ect? Autistic people CANNOT do that. Maybe to a certain degree they can pretend to through masking but only so far and not the way she does it. Like there have been situations where a person she doesn't even know says a implied two words, she won't know what they mean and then she will see their face and go OH. and this isn't enough evidence on it's own but this is just one small example and I am aware this is a complicated topic 

Another example is her baby talking in fact baby talking is a well known common symptom for people who fake autism. It doesn't mean they do, but it is one of the things people who do that often do. 

And also, she has been extremely inconsistent with her symptoms, I have seen this woman have an airhorn put in her ear, while she laughed it off and continued to socially interact and stay out by choice happily with no responses, talking up a storm like the social butterfly she is for the entire day without breaks. Every day. For like a week.  yet uncontrollably flap her arms dramatically ONE TIME in a year in public over someone picking up a small chair and moving it for a second. And we have hung out at the same place before multiple times and when the employees would move a chair all those other times she never reacted or cared not once. 

A huge red flag br didn't point out, is she has inconsistent stories about when she was diagnosed, what level her functioning is diagnosed at, and what form of autism she has. 

Like last night when I posted this I was upset but after I went and thought about it and witnessed what I have been witnessing I realized there is a very strong possibility br is actually right here. 

 hahaha she sounds super fake, imagine pretending to be mentally ill for attn or as an excuse for failure

Posts: 34
0 votes RE: My husband is accusing my neighbor of faking autism

Honestly it just looks like your hubby got triggered by someone, then pulled an elitist call out when he himself is not even on the spectrum. 

 honestly, it just looks like ur mad br chose delora lmao

Posts: 2669
0 votes RE: My husband is accusing my neighbor of faking autism

Honestly it just looks like your hubby got triggered by someone, then pulled an elitist call out when he himself is not even on the spectrum. 

 He has Asperger's syndrome 

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Posts: 33190
0 votes RE: My husband is accusing my neighbor of faking autism
Delora said: 

Honestly it just looks like your hubby got triggered by someone, then pulled an elitist call out when he himself is not even on the spectrum. 

 He has Asperger's syndrome 

Diagnosed from a professional, or as per conjecture? 

Ę̵̚x̸͎̾i̴͚̽s̵̻͐t̷͐ͅe̷̯͠n̴̤̚t̵̻̅i̵͉̿a̴̮͊l̵͍̂ ̴̹̕D̵̤̀e̸͓͂t̵̢͂e̴͕̓c̸̗̄t̴̗̿ï̶̪v̷̲̍é̵͔
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