public he is the only person that I truly genuinely love as in want to be in a close personal relationship with and live with and am infatuated with and pedestalize he is what my entire world centered around and I invested everything that I had into him and I cannot go on if he is going to continue to not publicly acknowledge that he wants to be with me too I am going to a psychiatric hospital and I am going to kill myself afterwards the entire time that I am in there I am going to be planning my suicide