I thought that I was going to go back to being the same as I used to be before I believed in christianity for the past year after I stopped believing again,  but something quite different is actually happening

 

I do not really have it in me to be purposefully mean to people anymore  and additionally,  I have been crying a lot  like a lot more than normal because of being aware of the person that I used to be especially while I was going through the psychosis most intensely before the christianity thing happened