Chapter 1
sinx=6n
implies
six=6
Chapter 2
My car broke down, so I take it in and the guy says that he’s a quantum mechanic...
...So I ask him if he can fix my car, or not? And he says: “I don’t know, I’ll have to look at it!”
psi_car = c0 |broken car> + c1 |pristine car>
After mechanic looks at the car: psi_car' = |pristine car>
ba-dum tsss
Chapter 3
Why are quantum physicists so poor at sex ?
Because when they find the position, they can't find momentum;
And when they find momentum, they can't find the position.
Heisenberg uncertainty deltax deltap >~ hbar/2
Chapter 4
There was this physicist who came to the ice cream bar every day
to buy two ice creams: one for himself and another that he offers to the empty spot next to him.
Eventually, the ice cream salesman asks him: "Why do you keep doing that?"
P: "Well... quantum mechanics teach us that it's theoratically possible for a girl to spontaneously burst into existence next to me and would want to accept my gift and be my girlfriend."
S: "But... plenty of hot, single women come here. Why don't you offer one of them an ice cream and maybe one of them will be your girlfriend?"
P: "Yeah, but what are the odds to that?"
