so where I am at right now, is that where I am going is going to allow me to give up material wealth and actually live off of my disability income which is a plus as far as being able to be closer to God, but also I am depressed over my attempt at finishing the twelve step program not working out, and as a result I am seeking to numb myself and since Michael is ignoring me I might end up like shooting up heroin in the future or maybe having an irl s**ual partner (never Michael irl because of his huge betrayal towards me when I was behaving like my old siren vampire self in hollywood 😡🙎♀️)
so yeah, I could really go for some heroin rn