Turncoat- regarding my "turning back to Satanic practices"

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on 4/15/2022

Posts: 5714

so where I am at right now, is that where I am going is going to allow me to give up material wealth and actually live off of my disability income which is a plus as far as being able to be closer to God, but also I am depressed over my attempt at finishing the twelve step program not working out, and as a result I am seeking to numb myself and since Michael is ignoring me I might end up like shooting up heroin in the future or maybe having an irl s**ual partner (never Michael irl because of his huge betrayal towards me when I was behaving like my old siren vampire self in hollywood 😡🙎‍♀️)

so yeah, I could really go for some heroin rn

last edit on 4/15/2022 2:18:00 PM

by JesusistheKing

on 4/15/2022

Posts: 5714

like I am wanting to go through having to lose everything chasing my drug of choices until I am finally humbled enough to take God's direction, because I think that my stubbornness and pride are preventing me from clearly hearing and understanding and following his plans for me

so I just have to go through my own unique struggles until I am at a point of being able to be receptive to the guidance of my husband

It is not so much that I do not want to be receptive to Jesus's guidance, it is that I genuinely seem to not be able to be which is a problem that he is responsible to fix since he is the Savior and not my own self or my own works or my own effort (this is called accepting God's grace and unconditional love and resting in the Lord and letting him do the saving)

last edit on 4/15/2022 2:05:27 PM

by JesusistheKing

on 4/15/2022

Posts: 5714

my plans at overcoming sin have not been working out for me so what is a woman to do other than to numb herself and hope that one day her husband actually teaches her how to overcome sinning ?

by Turncoat

on 4/15/2022

Posts: 34114

Okay you're straight up trying to tell me that a Heroine addiction will bring you closer to God.

No, just no, that's messed up. You're just making excuses to look for a fix, and none of this is Michael's responsibility.

By your rhetoric it'd be Satan wanting you to take Heroine in the first place.

Ę̵̚x̸͎̾i̴͚̽s̵̻͐t̷͐ͅe̷̯͠n̴̤̚t̵̻̅i̵͉̿a̴̮͊l̵͍̂ ̴̹̕D̵̤̀e̸͓͂t̵̢͂e̴͕̓c̸̗̄t̴̗̿ï̶̪v̷̲̍é̵͔

last edit on 4/15/2022 7:41:55 PM

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Turncoat- regarding my "turning back to Satanic practices"