An autistic rant at society - 1 - Sociopath Community

Am I imperfect because I cannot connect with it, or is society imperfect because it will not connect with me? I keep being told how to please society enough to be tolerated by it, but why won't anyone ever tell society to be such a way that I can tolerate it?

You say that I am disabled, and that's why I need to put forth the effort to make society accept me, but if that is so, why is it that you say I need to put in all the effort to navigate society? If I am truly disabled as you say, why is all the pressure put on me to make things work, and not the amazingly able "normal" people? If they are so amazing and capable, and I am imperfect and incapable, why do you expect me to do the thinking, effort, and navigation, and not them?

I am so sensitive and my sensitivity must be "fixed". Thousands of collective noises create a cacophony where I can barely think, a train rushes on the tracks, cars honking in heavy traffic, the chatter and conversation of hundreds of people, and me being bothered by all of this, means that I am sensitive? But yet society is so sensitive that they care what outfit I decide to wear, or if I say a sentence they find socially unacceptable? And I am the sensitive one?

I go after subjects I enjoy with a passion, watch any tv show or wear any clothes I enjoy without concern for social limitation, following only my heart when I go after what it is I want to do or wear or say. your professionals call this a dysfunction, a deviation from the social norm. and yet you say I, being autistic, am out of touch with my emotions or don't understand emotions or myself, but yet you, society, let social norms and limitations guide your way through your passions, desires, and goals, yet the normal ones are supposedly in touch with their feelings and self and I am not?

So I ask you, society, the next time you have a problem with me wearing a "strange" outfit, or I'm singing, or talking about a "strange" subject, is it my problem that you are bothered by my means of self expression, or is it your problem that you care?

🌺plumeria🌺 said:

So I ask you, society, the next time you have a problem with me wearing a "strange" outfit, or I'm singing, or talking about a "strange" subject, is it my problem that you are bothered by my means of self expression, or is it your problem that you care?

Speaking as a general point over this last part as a member of the aforementioned society, I tend to focus on the Common Denominator. If something I am wearing or doing otherwise is liable to get a bad response from people, even if I end up going through with it anyway I still tend to still be self-conscious of them, limiting a lot of freedoms I may have otherwise gone for if I'd felt unobserved or like people don't otherwise care.

Where we are is a shared space, and how others in that space respond to things I find hard to ignore. Rather than force others to conform to my expectations I've found more luck either cultivating or joining ones that share my sensibilities if not at least their themes, as to just barge into the middle of people of an unlike mind would serve to have me be a disruption versus their sense of peace.

I believe in having your own distinct interests, but I think that with the right crowds and presentation that it will typically go better than when thrown at a clumped majority of people. Discussing fighting games for example with someone who doesn't even like videogames will go nowhere.