We'll fight or you can ignore me cause I'll break and rebuild you, cause I don't like pathetic.
I am not pathetic, I have been through things you couldn't handle for a week, that would change you, yet somehow despite this I have held onto my humanity
You're also very foolish, and prone to sabotaging your own dreams.
We'll fight or you can ignore me cause I'll break and rebuild you, cause I don't like pathetic.
I am not pathetic, I have been through things you couldn't handle for a week, that would change you, yet somehow despite this I have held onto my humanity
You're also very foolish, and prone to sabotaging your own dreams.
No, it's not that I'm a fool but rather I'm not a user.
I know that if I stayed with him he would have helped me accomplish my goal
But I have integrity.
People are more important than my dreams.
I could have bullshat all day long
Made him stay
Used him and got what I wanted out of him.
But neither of us were happy.
So I let him go.
I could have gotten what I wanted first and then dropped him and played the victim card.
But I refuse to objectify anyone, everyone deserves autonomy.
You call me a fool for refusing to use people?
Maybe you are the fool
Maybe I threatened your perspective of what you think women are.
Users.
Maybe everything you think women are are only projections of yourself.
I could have gotten everything I wanted from him
But I let him go because he was unhappy.
I could have kept him here in person, and gotten my way. But I refused.
That's not foolishness, that's basic human decency.
Call me a fool for caring about the right thing more than I care about myself.
You are the fool, Tony. You think I'm so stupid I don't know how to have gotten what I wanted? I know how to serve myself if I want to, but I care about the greater good more than that.
Stop projecting the fact that you use people onto me.
Of course I can use people
I just REFUSE.
You may have heard by now I gave back the money to him, maybe that's part of why you think I am foolish.
I will not take his resources if relationship permanency is in question
You call it pride if you will, assume the worst case scenario if this situation challenges your false perspective on human nature.
I did it because of compassion.
I did it out of respect.
Call me a fool if you will.
If being a fool means doing what's right then thank you for the compliment sir
We'll fight or you can ignore me cause I'll break and rebuild you, cause I don't like pathetic.
I am not pathetic, I have been through things you couldn't handle for a week, that would change you, yet somehow despite this I have held onto my humanity
You're also very foolish, and prone to sabotaging your own dreams.
No, I'm not a user.
I know that if I stayed with him he would have helped me accomplish my goal
But I have integrity.
People are more important than my dreams.
I could have bullshat all day long
Made him stay
Used him and got what I wanted out of him.
But neither of us were happy.
So I let him go.
You call me a fool for refusing to use people?
Maybe you are the fool
Maybe I threatened your perspective of what you think women are.
Users.
I could have gotten everything I wanted from him
But I let him go because he was unhappy.
That's not foolishness, that's basic human decency.
Like I said before, the separation had to happen, though even I'm surprised he pulled it together this quickly.
Before you complained how he's useless and now you argue how you don't use people, and you know Noah would bring you closer to your dreams, but nay because of integrity ?
When you see an opportunity don't just sit there because of pride, take it, especially from Noah. ( And no this won't make you an opportunist cause you wouldn't be inflicting any harm on others for gain. )
I don't personally agree with marriage. It's but a commitment we can do without higher authority. But you did make some oath to go through thick and thin and of course uplift one another.
Obviously it was Noah's turn to do the uplifting, and he's doing it. Now you carry on like it's beneath you to accept a leg up cause you're hard.
Users are people who only reach out to others when they want something, and they expect things to be done for free. The user will then vanish until they want another favor. That isn't the case with you and your husband.
Pay the man a visit.
We'll fight or you can ignore me cause I'll break and rebuild you, cause I don't like pathetic.
I am not pathetic, I have been through things you couldn't handle for a week, that would change you, yet somehow despite this I have held onto my humanity
You're also very foolish, and prone to sabotaging your own dreams.
No, I'm not a user.
I know that if I stayed with him he would have helped me accomplish my goal
But I have integrity.
People are more important than my dreams.
I could have bullshat all day long
Made him stay
Used him and got what I wanted out of him.
But neither of us were happy.
So I let him go.
You call me a fool for refusing to use people?
Maybe you are the fool
Maybe I threatened your perspective of what you think women are.
Users.
I could have gotten everything I wanted from him
But I let him go because he was unhappy.
That's not foolishness, that's basic human decency.
Like I said before, the separation had to happen, though even I'm surprised he pulled it together this quickly
I threatened to call the cops if he didn't leave.
Before you complained how he's useless and now you argue how you don't use people, and you know Noah would bring you closer to your dreams, but nay because of integrity ?
I didn't say he is useless I said he was trying to use me and that caused trust issues.
When you see an opportunity don't just sit there because of pride, take it, especially from Noah. ( And no this won't make you an opportunist cause you wouldn't be inflicting any harm on others for gain. )
No I would be harming him I would be using him, that's harmful
I don't personally agree with marriage. It's but a commitment we can do without higher authority. But you did make some oath to go through thick and thin and of course uplift one another.
And part of that commitment is to do what's best for each other and right now we need space.
Obviously it was Noah's turn to do the uplifting, and he's doing it. Now you carry on like it's beneath you to accept a leg up cause you're hard.
No, it's because I'm unsure of the relationship because he was abusive.
Users are people who only reach out to others when they want something, and they expect things to be done for free. The user will then vanish until they want another favor. That isn't the case with you and your husband.
Pay the man a visit.
After I feel safe.
We'll fight or you can ignore me cause I'll break and rebuild you, cause I don't like pathetic.
Jeez dude, you don't respond well to people treating you that way so why turn that on Delora? What do you just think I gave up on trying to do towards you, the very same thing.
Weren't you the one getting at me for going after people with mental issues? At this point with the two separated this looks like you gloating or some shit, it doesn't have productive value towards either of them, and I'm not even sure what you're getting out of it other than a sense of sadistic glee over an autist.
You are the fool, Tony. You think I'm so stupid I don't know how to have gotten what I wanted? I know how to serve myself if I want to, but I care about the greater good more than that.
Stop projecting the fact that you use people onto me.
Of course I can use people
I just REFUSE.
He behaves as if that's the world, rather than just himself. Past discussions with him have yielded a transactional sense of interaction between the genders, rather than a model of synergy. It's as if they serve a form and function rather than being peers when you really get him going.
You are the fool, Tony. You think I'm so stupid I don't know how to have gotten what I wanted? I know how to serve myself if I want to, but I care about the greater good more than that.
Stop projecting the fact that you use people onto me.
Of course I can use people
I just REFUSE.
He behaves as if that's the world, rather than just himself. Past discussions with him have yielded a transactional sense of interaction between the genders, rather than a model of synergy. It's as if they serve a form and function rather than being peers when you really get him going.
Wow ty tc :) that's cool of you
I don't think SpatialMind's advice is useful here..... You two have never been happy. You two will never be happy.
If you didn't lie and blow things out of proportion... BR choked and raped you. You should absolutely not be in a relationship with someone like that.
If you lied or blew things out of proportion.... You went crazy enough to go on a public forum and shame your husband with wild accusations. You should not be together.
Either way... You're better off without each other.
I don't think SpatialMind's advice is useful here..... You two have never been happy. You two will never be happy.
If you didn't lie and blow things out of proportion... BR choked and raped you. You should absolutely not be in a relationship with someone like that.
If you lied or blew things out of proportion.... You went crazy enough to go on a public forum and shame your husband with wild accusations. You should not be together.
Either way... You're better off without each other.
I would agree if one of them was more normalish.
But unless the person breaking the relationship is going to work on him/her self and fix the issues they have, there is no point, they won't find a better partner.
And I think BR did something and I think Delora posting here is bad, so they both are in error.
It might be best they stay together if they work on their issues together and support each other. But it could also get worse if they can't handle it. And maybe if they split, one of them might actually work on themselves. So, it is hard to say which path is best for them.
The problem is they are both uncool, it's not one side or the other.
So I think it's best they keep posting here and stay together, to make content. It is best for me. Probably not for them.
But unless the person breaking the relationship is going to work on him/her self and fix the issues they have, there is no point, they won't find a better partner.
Suppose that is true, which I don't think it necessarily is... the choice is between being single and allegedly constant hell with raping and choking, and demonstrably years of drama with the relationship serving as a gladiator arena for SC.
I'm all for..... trying to save relationships. I have a hard time believing there is much to salvage here. Concretely... I've never seen a successful example of a relationship this toxic and drama-ridden be salvaged. Have you..?
As for why I don't think that's necessarily true.. Two people can be toxic to each other. They can be fine with other people. But put them together... and you get poison. But I suppose the point is that you're convinced that that's not the case.
I have seen examples of people breaking up and both ending up happily with someone else... Not necessarily someone as damaged as BR and Delora... Sure. But still. I'd say I've seen more evidence in that direction than evidence of highly toxic relationships healing.
