my name is Matrix. I desperately try to fit in. Yet, all I do is fail. Nobody likes me here. Actually, I am even hated by many. The ones that do not hate me, do not care at all about me. I have low education, my financial situation is horrible and Im so retarded and dumb that I try to front another lie for it every few days. I also throw tantrums and claim to have brain cancer, mental breakdowns etc for attention. Every two weeks or so I make a big thread that I am leaving the community, only to come back after 10 minutes. I am so unhappy. I have no perspective in life. I have no discipline and no good qualities, thats why I come here instead of making something out of my life. I could change some things, improve, get qualifications long term and so on, but I am too weak. I choose to make up shit instead for example that I grew 30cm in height in one month. Everyone thinks I am pathetic. Nobody respects me or believes me. I also know this, but I have accepted my position. I have given up on myself, just like everyone else has. I cannot bear being alone. I am so alone.