that was my own desire not Jesus' true will but I thought if I had faith it would happen lol
It turns out I am supposed to be a passive peaceful vessel and do more peaceful spiritual warfare such as when I accidentally casted out a bunch of demons during Logan Paul's fight just because I didnt like the violent vibe
I just wanted the vibe to be nice so I texted the beast who I was talking to at the time Mike Majlak who I didnt know was the beast yet andd I said be gentle, you are fine the way you are and you dont have to prove anything to anyone, trying to share my peace and gentleness that is in me thru Jesus' holy spirit and when I did that it ended up casting out a bunch of demons and then the vibe became much more peaceful and gentle