Disney needs to be an expensive luxuary so they can filter the public

As someone who lives in the theme park capital of the world, I fucking hate theme parks. The only time I will agree to go is for a holiday event, but only if I didn't already have any other plans.

They're not all they're cracked up to be, like. The fun isn't, in the exterior, the over priced food, or the non-exilerating rides that just make you feel sick to your stomach. It's, the experience, of going with a group. That, makes it fun.

And, if you don't absolutely love the people you're with, and enjoy spending time with them like, it's... not going to be that exciting.

The only place I liked growing up was gaylord palms because it is just a giant fucking pool, and I loved playing in pools so this was like magical to a kid. And the hotels were extremely nice, there was hot tubs everywhere so you didn't get cold. The only downside was like, having to get in the elevator soaking wet to go to your room, and they had like no *good* food.

Neither does Disney though.

As someone who has been to Disney 600 million times because it's basically in my backyard, *and every other park* ... the best place to eat on the map, of all the parks, is Epcot, in the "Paris bistro" thingy. I don't know if it's even there anymore to be honest because I haven't been in so long. But, I *really* admired the fact they had imported stuff in the Paris Bistro from Paris, and literally tried to do their best to replicate Paris in the bistro, like, it was very realistic, down to the waiters. Like, the waiters, were actors. But it was the best orange juice I've ever had, which you can't find just anywhere. Only in like Europe and then in Mexico they have a similar version, the US has their own version but. The European one is the best, it comes in a glass bottle and it's basically sparkling orange juice so. That to me was like, the highlight of my life right there that sparkling orange juice man it fucking hits different when it's from France. So good lol. Like top 10 favorite things to drink on this planet lol. Goes really well with their chocolate croissants which were huge.

The churros, in Epcot, are really good. Not as good as the ones in Mexico which are from an authentic traditional recipe born in Mexico and passed down for generations inside of a Mexican family owned restaurant that has stood historically in Mexico for over a century but- nonetheless, they were like, Oh... that was good. lol.

Also I will say, Disney merchandise, some of it is extremely fucking cute and really well made, well designed products. Because I am a coffee whore, it makes sense for me to get their cups. I love their cups, even better than the Starbucks ones design wise like, I just, genuinely love the cups Disney makes. Like, their "tumblers" for coffee to carry around yeah. Save the planet, with straws that are reusable, and cups, that kind of deal.

The ice cream at Nasa is really good ice cream like, it's above average for sure. I wish they had more flavors. I mean it's not like, decadent perfection like top tier shit but, it's def different than your standard ben and jerry's. Nasa is cool if you don't have an issue with having panic attacks lol, but for me it was just a little too much. Like you can go on this ride that simulates blasting off into space and just.... lol. I was like um.... no thanks.

They also have one at Disney which, is just nauseating but, a lot of kids are obsessed with it.

The nickelodeon hotel as well, not that fun but, for four year olds, maybe fantastic. Will be a lot of screaming and fits and crying though because thats what toddlers do but. The reason I'm mentioning it is because they have all the Disney characters come out in the mornings and the evenings in the dining hall downstairs and they interact with the kids, which is insanely creepy looking but, amazing how realistic they look and act. That was, a nice touch I will say lol, like, I was uncomfortable but, entertained nonetheless. They put on quite a show. And they make you eat pancakes that are Mickey Mouse shaped and all that, which I mean, they were average but. That was kinda cool I guess lol. Oh yeah and they had a chef making like, pancake art on the pancakes like, so they looked like realistic renderings of the characters which was, like, fucking amazing lol

As far as Disney goes... there was nothing memorable about the food but, they had lots of ice cream. Like, if you go to the Disney resort, they have an ice cream shop that has something called "the kitchen sink" just google it, "Disney kitchen sink ice cream desert" and you'll see what i'l talking about. It's, absolutely insane. That was kind of a fun night, because I liked the group I was with, and we went there specifically just for one hour, to eat the ice cream (with a RESERVATION) very important detail of the plan...lol. And, yeah. it was good I guess, I mean. Nothing exquisite in taste but, it's just an over the top experience that to a kid would be kind of magical I guess?

The rooms at gaylord palms are nicer than any rooms I've ever been to in Florida, of all the resorts and parks.

The water parks are so disgusting and lame, the lazy river is aight but you can't really relax because you're having to look out for bumping into people a lot. I tried the most intense ride they have, and I was unphased. My friends seemed to really enjoy it, but I was just like going in circles on this tube down into a Giant funnel and I'm just spinning around like, looking out over the horizon (because it's really high up) with a completely straight phase, and at one point we came so close to the edge of the funnel, I could of literally let go of the raft and would have actually fallen over the edge to my actual death not even joking. And I still, wasn't like, scared, I just looked down over the edge like, "well, that's really close to the edge" looking down at the floor like, "hey look, all the people look really small"

and then we swung back over to the other side and went down the drain and I'm just like......... aight... when we got spit out you get spit out so forcefully I'm just like dawg, is this gonna give me a wedgy? I'm out.

Unimpressed. Bored. Next.

As a kid, I always enjoyed bumper cars, ice skating, swimming, arcades, manhunt, paintball, or playing with four wheelers and motorcycles and such. I've just been more into like, actively doing something rather than just, passively walking through a theme park, I'm not entertained. I'm just hot and tired of walking, tired in general, tired of being around people and want to literally go home and sleep.

So that's that. A synopsis on theme parks, you're welcome. Seriously, gaylord palms is the better option if you love water and swimming (if you're not enamored with Disney world like some people are).

But in my opinion, I prefer "trips" and "adventures" to theme parks. California and Mexico were the most enjoyable experiences, and Germany. I loved Germany. The Netherlands was alright but I really had to get used to everything being so tightly packed together in Amsterdam. Felt kind of claustophic and small, a busy busy city all crammed onto bicycles and closely knit together, so close that, even in the theaters we're packed like sardines, even in our homes, they are tiny- minimal, and so close together you can see into each others windows. But damn the weed was good. And getting out on the bikes and just riding around town was so fun, but I'm the kind of person who loves riding bikes anyways so like, it was just magical.

Oh and another magical place to ride bikes, Martha's Vineyard, and Catalina island in Mexico. Such beautiful places to visit. Worth the ferry over. Oh my god so worth it lol. I used a motorized bike to help get through the sandy parts.

I highly recommend if you want to bike anywhere, invest in your *own* bike, don't rent one. The seats are terrible on rentals and will literally bruise your ass.

If you do choose to see Florida's parks, unless it's a water park specifically- you're going to want to wait until December or January. If you come in June, you're going to regret it lol.

The beaches aren't that great you're not missing out on much, if you want a beach trip, go to Anna Maria island (but make sure it's not hurricane season/has a good weather report, and no red tide), treasure island, st. Augustine (beautiful art town as well you can walk around in), or, Destin is kind of a cute but peaceful "high end" beach town, with luxury shopping, cute little key west style beach houses that are newly built and well kept, it looks like a video game like, Destin doesn't look like a real place. It's, really pretty and beautiful lol. Reminds me of California's beaches which are >>>>> compared to Florida. Like, Laguna in California.... oh my god. just, don't even get me started all of the places in California there are to see.. my god. gorgeous. absolutely, insanely gorgeous. Love it.

If you want super super rustic, there are islands off of the keys you can stay on, one of them is Beyonce's and it is fucking exquisite. Never seen anything quite like it... (yes Beyonce has an island). But it does get to 102-110 degrees and with the humidity it feels more like 115 in the summers so just.... beware. The sun poisoning is real, it can happen in one day. There are bugs on the beaches in the evenings and at night, and it is not fun getting itchy bites from them (which you will get tons)

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